well well well?
My goal to do some shit form of a blog daily failed, my intentions are way more optimistic than my realistic lazy ass drive I have after work. its kind of like when you go to your favorite place to eat and order the fat kid special after being on some bullshit diet, that requires no effort but makes you feel like your making the world a better place er I mean better body....so I like the no effort part but lets be honest drinking some sperm water and eating a dildo fruit doesn't take much effort.
My ideas of what I want to do are fucked up, they have good intentions but as soon as it has a title and a schedule im losing interest. so I guess this is where im the guy off the diet ordering the lard burger with out the intent to do the work to make up for it. or in this case my plan to do a daily blog. but(butt fuck lol) fuck its not like anyone is reading this! if you are sitting on that chair at work or home going...please let this fuck head make another post, and if that's the case we need to talk cause there is some shit going wrong in your life! I don't mind talking just send me a message!
so after these two poor paragraphs all I was trying to say is that this blog should be called the inconsistent blog cause I might post daily some times or weekly? fuck even I don't know. but who ever is not reading thanks I appreciate it! I will write something soon I promise!
suck my balls
Wednesday, April 9, 2014
Friday, March 21, 2014
Dogtards high on sniff
Day 2? or 3...Depends on how we want to count this honestly, eh never mind. train of thought just left station for la la land.
Sooo back to where I think we ended this steaming pile of blog off last night. Dogs! I paused at that exclamation point for about 5 minutes to watch a dog toss a half decapitated mouse toy in the air, a celebration of stuffed fluffy toy death... hold in mouth then fling into the air, circle circle the corpse then repeat till something happens? Maybe stuffed angels from petco come down and take pity on the cotton soul-filled creature that is ripped to shreds in mere moments cause the god that creates such stuffed creatures is a 10 year old child in a Cambodian sweat shop with the sewing skills of a blind dude with Elephantiasis.
Back to the dogs..... starting with the bitch, cause bitches always come first!(if your good)
Freya: The only female quadruped in this house about 3 years old. she is the typical Chihuahua except longer hair and big ears, that go well with her goofy face and demeanor. She likes to play police when the other two dogs play by barking at them like some short fat teacher trying to break up a school yard fight with a whistle from 50 yards away.
Rowan: where to start? I guess imagine a 15 pound blonde fox that parachuted into Colombia's cocaine fields and spent his first years of his life living off of coca leaves and cocaine infused water. He's a fucking nut and that's an understatement, the guy puts the Tasmanian devil to shame. He has the ability to play fight with three separate animals at once, moving from one fight to another with the biggest shit eating grin one can have without having your jaw recede to the back of your skull like some shit out of a fucked up horror movie.
Loki: This guy is the OG or OD, our first dog and a big one at that for a yellow lab. He bounces between 90 and a 100 pounds depending on how much food he can sneak in! He once almost ate himself to death no joke, for the low cost of 1300 bills! But I'm sure he was the happiest of dogs in that moment stuffing his face like honey boo boos mom on a all inclusive trip to buffet land. Beside that, he is a lover of interpretive shallow water dog dancing and competitive rawhide speed eating contest.
well I think that's enough for poor grammar and trying to squeeze thoughts from my alcohol infused brain tonight. until next time I........
Sooo back to where I think we ended this steaming pile of blog off last night. Dogs! I paused at that exclamation point for about 5 minutes to watch a dog toss a half decapitated mouse toy in the air, a celebration of stuffed fluffy toy death... hold in mouth then fling into the air, circle circle the corpse then repeat till something happens? Maybe stuffed angels from petco come down and take pity on the cotton soul-filled creature that is ripped to shreds in mere moments cause the god that creates such stuffed creatures is a 10 year old child in a Cambodian sweat shop with the sewing skills of a blind dude with Elephantiasis.
Back to the dogs..... starting with the bitch, cause bitches always come first!(if your good)
Freya: The only female quadruped in this house about 3 years old. she is the typical Chihuahua except longer hair and big ears, that go well with her goofy face and demeanor. She likes to play police when the other two dogs play by barking at them like some short fat teacher trying to break up a school yard fight with a whistle from 50 yards away.
Rowan: where to start? I guess imagine a 15 pound blonde fox that parachuted into Colombia's cocaine fields and spent his first years of his life living off of coca leaves and cocaine infused water. He's a fucking nut and that's an understatement, the guy puts the Tasmanian devil to shame. He has the ability to play fight with three separate animals at once, moving from one fight to another with the biggest shit eating grin one can have without having your jaw recede to the back of your skull like some shit out of a fucked up horror movie.
Loki: This guy is the OG or OD, our first dog and a big one at that for a yellow lab. He bounces between 90 and a 100 pounds depending on how much food he can sneak in! He once almost ate himself to death no joke, for the low cost of 1300 bills! But I'm sure he was the happiest of dogs in that moment stuffing his face like honey boo boos mom on a all inclusive trip to buffet land. Beside that, he is a lover of interpretive shallow water dog dancing and competitive rawhide speed eating contest.
well I think that's enough for poor grammar and trying to squeeze thoughts from my alcohol infused brain tonight. until next time I........
Thursday, March 20, 2014
First one..... Touch and go
So here we delve into a mind and house full of anything that is the norm.
But then again what the fuck is the norm? A umbrella in the rain? A tooth pick up a dick? A head in the freezer?
Day 1: starts with a shit attempt at starting a blog. Due to the fact I enter my berth year as 2014 into googles fascist age limiting proxy to an nonexistent fetus being able to express it's self. As all nonexistent fetuses know were very opinionated and like to force our views on everything and anything that has a heartbeat!
Enough with the fetus and beating old ladies with Doritos loco tacos bullshit or what ever is the new chemically injected craze!
So here we will start with the family! 3 dogs and 2 cats! All have there own version of psychosis and schizophrenia mixed with a potential to sink a oil tanker with there capacity to shit a tanker to the bottom of the ocean floor!
Cats first! Cause pussy is always first!!! Kitty: he's 10 and has the temperament of a mongoose high on meth . No regards for anyone, touch him, pet him, try to love him he will fuck your hands wilth his claws of Zeus. Of corse with love!!!
The new kid/kitten! Aka mr stich Murphy: he's 4 months old or some shit. This little guy is like a 12 year old kid from the city,, that steals your money and then makes you feel bad about itt!! Biggest little manipulator I know!! Little shit will cry in your right ear, then sprint to the left and lick your carls jr ranch sauce!!!
We'll enough for tonight.!!! To much drink and smoke, tomorrow we can talk the shit that is dogs
But then again what the fuck is the norm? A umbrella in the rain? A tooth pick up a dick? A head in the freezer?
Day 1: starts with a shit attempt at starting a blog. Due to the fact I enter my berth year as 2014 into googles fascist age limiting proxy to an nonexistent fetus being able to express it's self. As all nonexistent fetuses know were very opinionated and like to force our views on everything and anything that has a heartbeat!
Enough with the fetus and beating old ladies with Doritos loco tacos bullshit or what ever is the new chemically injected craze!
So here we will start with the family! 3 dogs and 2 cats! All have there own version of psychosis and schizophrenia mixed with a potential to sink a oil tanker with there capacity to shit a tanker to the bottom of the ocean floor!
Cats first! Cause pussy is always first!!! Kitty: he's 10 and has the temperament of a mongoose high on meth . No regards for anyone, touch him, pet him, try to love him he will fuck your hands wilth his claws of Zeus. Of corse with love!!!
The new kid/kitten! Aka mr stich Murphy: he's 4 months old or some shit. This little guy is like a 12 year old kid from the city,, that steals your money and then makes you feel bad about itt!! Biggest little manipulator I know!! Little shit will cry in your right ear, then sprint to the left and lick your carls jr ranch sauce!!!
We'll enough for tonight.!!! To much drink and smoke, tomorrow we can talk the shit that is dogs
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)